Tuesday, July 28, 2015

22 Years old, Officially

Happy birthday to me. Happy 22nd to me. and happy many returns.

Happy a step closer to death, Nabila.

Yes. That is me. the one with the white tudung. :) 
I rarely upload my picture in social media because i dont want people to know me. but since there is nobody will read my blog so there you go., that is my face, and i run this blog by myself. 

my 22nd years old doesnt do much change from 21st birthday. you can read it here 21st birthday entry

22 Years old and, 

i dont know how to drive or ride motorcycle. 
i dont wear makeups. Well basically i do light makeup on several occasions only. *sigh
i dont wear heels. Well basically i do but rarely. Like once a year HAHA
i dont have a boyfriend for almost 4 years already HAHA
not married/ engage/ have kids
still pursuing my degree in UMS Labuan International Campus 
my eyebrow is ORIGINAL okay. 
i dont wear contact lenses. I JUST DONT okay.
i dont have many friends HAHA but i have many crushes 
an orphan that lives a blissful life
need house cleaning? contact me. i am very good at house cleaning. 
still average in cooking 

Happy 22nd birthday, Nabila Aman/ Bunga Nabila/ Bella Ak**v**/ A***l* Alvarez/ Bella deTrix

May all of your dreams come true, may Allah ease your journey, may Allah grant you the best nur hidayah, may Allah gives you the best in life and hereafter. be a good daughter to mom and dad. Never forget Allah. May Allah ease your sakaratul maut. 

Live a healthy life, always shares your portion with everyone else. Sedekah selalu. Senyum selalu. Jangan sombong. Selalu mengalah, be kind to whoever it is. 

"Be the flower that still flaunt its scent even to the hand that crushes it" 

Selamat Ulang Tahun for me ;) 

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Confession Z

Hello everyone.

I am one of JulyBabies. my birthdate is near so... i have a confessions to make.

I am an orphan. I do not have mother since i was eleven years old, and i lost my father when i was 18 years old. Yeah, i lost both parents when i needed them the most. I am proud of my parents. My mother was a kadazan dusun and my father was a bajau. :)

Looking into it, there is not plenty of memories i can recall with my mother. and im kinda regret it. i didnt get enough time to cherish her, to appreciate her. And things got worse when she left, that our welfare are often ignored. I know my father works hard for us, and tried to give us (me and my 9 years old brother) enough attention. but, i guess times arent a friend after all. My father was assigned to outstation works in peninsular, around sabah... But its okay Dad, we did fine.

Now, im living with my first sister (she havent marry yet), and my little brother. My second sister got married and she lived with her husband, just down a couple of street. I lived in flat (ugly) that has 3 bedroom with 1 bathroom.

People often asks me, How do you do? Are you okay? if you need help im just a phone call away. so how was life treating you? you still live in the same flat?

but what do i hear?

How is life treating you after they took your parents away from you? are you financially stable now? what did you do for that gopro and pink iphone 6?

But some do asks me straight

How do you look so financially stable since you lost both parents already?

Things got so puzzled for them when i further my studies in local university. I dont apply for the study loan. yet i dont even receive any scholarships from any institutions. i dont even apply for the financial aid in my campus. no i dont.

Yeah. I might lived in a ugly cracking flat, i dont even have parents, but one thing for sure, they taught me how to live independently. Some of my friends even think that i have sugardaddy or what similar terms you call to buy me all the stuff i own now. And thats why i hated to make friends with people.

Rules NO 2; Do not underestimate people.

I might look sad, but oh look! i have several commas in my bank account! and this house is already under my name. and i got a business license too. oh and this permit was under my name too.

and yes, i got it from my father.

You wanna know what is rule no 1?
Do not trust people.

I get asked, like a lot of times already.
Jadi siapalah masak di rumah kamu tu?
siapa2 ja yang ada di rumah kamu?
kakak kau kerja apa?

but im okay. im fine. it is such a life test and i get through it very tough.

The lesson is, never ever underestimate people. You are not an observer to judge and please dont stereotype that soon. You just make a will for them. I dont have parents, and that is so okay with me. I moved on already. Its not good if you sad for a long period of time for the deaths of somebody. and dont ever sympathized me, im not that type of person who liked being sympathized. well if you are going to give me 500million then its okay with me. until then, do not even judge me. You guys dont know my life then what gives you the privileges to say about it? i know, you guys liked to wonders and guess about my life, right? well go on. its fun that way. Its awesome that way.